Tips on Dating: 5 Ways to Screw Up Royally

The moment has finally arrived. That person you wanted to go out with gave you the green light.

Took them long enough. Keep that thought to yourself but it did take them long enough. Nonetheless you were patient and persistent without going overboard; at least that is your story and you are sticking to it. But a few things are clear. The other person is not going out with you because of pity or a desire to get you off their back. They are going out with you because they like you and want to.

Yet sometimes when we humans get exactly what we want, there is a tendency to consciously or sub consciously self sabotage the moment. Or in plain English screw it up royally.

Naturally you want to make a fantastic and lasting impression on the person. The whole aim is make a connection to get more dates and possibly grow a relationship.

However if your goal is to create a lasting impression and not the good kind then try the following.

1. Exaggerate Your Worth

In some countries including this one it is known as lying. And it does not have to be the super duper kind that get your date looking at you funny. Just little shades of gray that do not add up can have the same effect.

2. Did You Mention That...?

Commonly referred to as hogging the conversation. You are excited about the date. Terrific. As a matter of fact you are so excited that you have talked thru the entire date. The evening is over and you do not know anymore about the person than you did before the two of you went out. Oh that's right you do know a couple of things about them. One is they don't talk much. And two they seem to have a lot of tension in their jaw muscles.

3. Your Sphinx Impersonation

Are you happy the person is going out with you? No doubt about it. Except you are not quite conveying it. No you do not dominate the conversation which is good. The problem is you have no conversation; which is not good. No jokes, no topics of discussion and your response to anything your date says is unresponsive. Still it's curious to you as to why they wanted to go home early.

4. Fashionably Late

You are going to wow your date when they first lay eyes on you by dressing to the nines. You look so good that you can't stand it.

Neither can your date because in your quest to knock their socks off, you were late. Very late. No biggie because look at the end result. You look great but you were still not on time and your date is still ticked off about it.

5. You Agree

Your date says their favorite color is blue. Yours too. Your date says their favorite sport is ice hockey. Yours too. Your date says their favorite hobby is to go swimming in the Nile River; upstream. Yours too. In fact you agree to everything they say. This is a clear sign that you are either their long lost twin (in which case you should not be dating) or that you are trying to make such a impression that you are agreeing to just about anything and everything. Not a good idea.

Yes you are excited about this date. You should be. You should also want to make a good impression. No problems there. But if you want the date to end on a sour note with no chance of ever dating this person or any other person successfully by all means follow any or all of the five tips listed above.

Article written by Daryl Campbell at The Relationship Tip. And stay away from the new rude

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by DARYL CAMPBELL

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My Husband Had an Affair and I Don't Think I Can Ever Get Over It - Tips and Advice That May Help

Almost on a daily basis, I get emails from wives who tell me that they feel pretty sure that they will "never, ever" get over the fact that their husband cheated and had an affair. They may well still love their husbands. They may be 100% committed to keeping their family together and staying in the marriage. But, they have resigned themselves to a life that is not everything that it can be, and to a marriage that is sort of just limping along and going through the motions because the wife can not let herself trust or go "all in" again.

Understandably, she's guarded and she's resentful. Sure, she's making the best of it for the sake of her family, but she doesn't believe that she'll ever be truly happy in her marriage again, and this is mostly because she can't "get over" the affair. I'm about to tell you something that I know from experience. You may not believe me right now, but I hope that you can at least keep this somewhere in the back of your mind. The truth is, you don't need to focus so much on semantics. You may not even "get over" the affair. But, you can create a new marriage that is somewhat separate from this issue. I will discuss this more in the following article.

You Can Make Your Own Rules After The Affair. You Don't Need To Follow Some One Else's Path: I can not tell you how often people write to me and tell me that they're sad to admit that their marriage is doomed after infidelity because they know that they "will never be able to forgive" or just can't see themselves "getting over it." Often they will say this before they've even made a complete attempt to do this. Sometimes, we just take our preconceived notions and hold onto them like a huge crutch.

But, let's say that this is true (even though I believe it rarely is.) Let's say that you can't forgive. Let's say that you're never able to get the affair completely out of your mind. If this is your case, you certainly are not alone. This is true of many people. But, people are able to work around this each and every day. You really can not just proclaim how you are going to feel tomorrow or next year. This is a process. Just because you're unable to forgive right now doesn't mean that you won't see this differently once you've done some things that will help you begin to heal.

Don't get too caught up on what you "should" do or feel. This is not a process that follows along one specific path. The really important thing is that you commit to keep moving forward no matter what is happening around you. So long as you vow that you're not going to let this squeeze out every ounce of happiness that you deserve, you will eventually make it and come to a place where you wake up one morning and know that you are going to be OK. Don't become frustrated if you're not feeling better as soon as you thought you might. This is a very difficult situation. If you are doing the best you can and are focusing on doing just a little bit better each and every day, then you have nothing to be ashamed of.

Why You Can't Just Decide To Get Over The Affair: I often have people tell me "OK, I've made up my mind. I'm going to forgive him. From this point on, I've decided that I'm going to 'get over it.'" Usually, I will hear from these same people a little while later and they feel like failures or they are frustrated because they are regressing back to their old feelings. They wonder why they can not just control their own feelings. They worry that they are doing something wrong or that they are not a good enough person to offer forgiveness.

Few of these things are true. It's just that they're trying to rush the process and they often have not begun to do the work that is necessary to begin the healing process. Many people (myself included) do not understand at first what they are going to need to be able to begin letting go of the anger. Often, you are going to need reassurance that this will not happen again. You will often want to understand what things lead up to this so that you can prevent them. And, you will need to work on your relationship with yourself (to restore your self esteem) and with your spouse so that you are building up the relationship rather than tearing it down.

In this eventual process, you will eventually realize that your relationship with your spouse is stronger partly because your relationship with yourself is stronger. Often, we just need some time to evaluate this when the feelings and emotions are not fresh and spinning out of control. It is usually only at this time are we able to remember the good things that do matter in the end. But, when you're angry, hurt, and betrayed, you're often just not able to see these things.

Don't feel pressured to "get over it" or to forgive if you just are not ready. You will know when you are, if that day comes. Until then, don't be so hard on yourself. Just vow to take care of yourself and to try to evaluate things with an eye toward healing rather than prolonging the hurt. Healing may mean that you decide to be alone or it might now. Whatever you decide, always evaluate things in terms of your own emotional health and what is right for you without apology.

Although it surprised me, what was right for me was sticking around and working things out. But, I worked on myself too and this made a huge difference. Although I never would've believed this two years ago, my marriage is stronger than ever after my husband's affair. It took a lot of work, and I had to play the game to win, but it was worth it. Because of all the work I did on myself, my self esteem is at an all time high. I no longer worry my husband will cheat again. You can read my very personal story on my blog at http://surviving-the-affair.com/

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By Katie Lersch

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Three Tips to Find Out Who Your Wife Lover - Is her Cheating?

One of the most difficult things that a man will ever have to go through is coming to the realization that his wife may be cheating on him. This is something that no man wants to deal with, but if you suspect that your wife is cheating on you, then you must find out who it is. Here are 3 tips that will lead you to the person your wife is cheating on you with.

1. The first thing that you must do is notice any signs that she is displaying. Is she mentioning someone that she works with or socializes with excessively? Obviously you have reasons to believe that your wife is cheating, so just make sure that you pay attention to all the signs, to help narrow your focus as to who the culprit could be.

2. Another thing that you could do is hire a private investigator. This method works well, but can be really expensive and is not always necessary. You may feel the need to keep tabs on your wife, but make sure that you do not stalk her. If she gets the sense that you are always around then she will probably just leave you right then and there.

3. The best method that I have found to bust a cheating spouse is to conduct a reverse cell phone search online.This is a simple, yet extremely effective way to catch a cheating spouse, The reason that it works so well is that you can literally get the first and last name, address, and even a google map the the persons house for each number that appears in her phone.

Using this single method, you will be able to take a huge step in the right direction to find out who your wife is cheating on you with.

Find Out Who Owns Any Cell Phone Number Just 2 Minutes From Now! I Know You Have Been Curious About Who Owns That Cell Number That Keep Calling You Or Your Spouse, So Find Out Now! Find Who Owns Any Number. Visit http://www.reversecellularlookups.info For Instant Access! I have researched the best websites for looking up cell phones over the last 9 months and found this one to be the absolute best!

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By Halia Pendergrass

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Five Sweet Things to Make Her Feel Special and Fall For You Tonight

We can't help but get a little tongue tied around girls even on a date --- hey, you should be happy and take advantage of this opportunity in any way you can! Dating a girl would be the perfect way for you to get to know each other plus, the flirting fun begins! But wait --- if you want to get a little close for comfort, nothing beats reciting a few sweet lines to make her blush and feel a little giddy inside. So if you're planning to have an all-out romantic night tonight, here are five sweet things to say to girls that will definitely take your relationship on the next level. Here's how:

• "I wish you were my girlfriend." A lot of confidence is needed to say this out loud --- and make sure both of you have reached a certain level of comfort for each other that it'll make it sound smoother and more romantic. Of course, you don't blurt this out on your first date together --- she'll definitely flee from you the next minute. So be patient.
• "You look real pretty when you smile". Ever wondered what makes a girl go totally weak to her knees? Tell her she looks pretty when she smiles. One of the many soft spots of women is when you compliment them about their good looks --- it's a sure way to make her blush.
• "I want to hold your hand." So you're both getting a little flirty and you can practically feel her breathing on your neck --- go ahead and pop the question. Or better yet, gradually inch your hand toward hers and then say that you want to hold her hand. Believe me, 90% of the time, she'll say yes.
• "I feel very happy when you're around." Let's say you're almost on that level when you're almost a couple --- this is probably the sweetest thing to say to a girl --- not to mention that this is going to be beautiful start before asking her to be your girlfriend. Hurray!
• "I think I'm falling in love with you." Surprises can be romantic and girls love them. Nothing beats drama if you want to keep up with a girl. So catch her off guard by saying this line out of the blue: "I think I'm falling in love." Well, don't expect her to say the very same thing right away. Give her time. But heck, who knows? Maybe she's been waiting for it forever.

Do you want to become a master when it comes to reading the signs of flirting? Are you still hungry for more sweet things to say to girls to make her fall for you? Can you handle the excitement and thrill of my free seduction advice? Unravel more techniques on how to be an expert when it comes to dating and flirting with women by visiting my website this very second! You're just one click away from it all.

If you are truly serious about mastering the art of attraction and being able to date and seduce ANY girl you want, visit this free website now and get a free report: Master Online Dater

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By Mark J Hamilton

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How to Tell If a Girl is Interested - Sure Fire Keys Which Will Reveal Whether She is Interested

By Jason Leading

You can never learn to read a woman. You just can't tell if the girl is into you or not. What kind of game is she playing? Or am I just blind to the signs? Check out these three tips to finally tell if a girl is interested in you.

She's jealous: If you notice she starts tapping her foot rapidly when you take too long on the phone with a woman, then watch out! This girl is totally into you if she seems jealous when you spend too much time on another girl.

Confirm your suspicion by talking about another girl when you're with her. If she starts fidgeting or making a sarcastic remark, she's interested in you. Once you've confirmed it then stop! If you go on and on about the other girl, you'll lose this one.

She's always trying to get your attention: Have you noticed she's always trying to talk to you? Maybe she comes over to your desk at work to show you what she's been working on. Or maybe she calls you up to go for a movie or some coffee.

If the girl is trying to spend more time with you and doing things to attract your attention, she's definitely into you!

She looks at you when you talk: When you are having an interesting conversation and speaking your mind, have you noticed she can't keep her eyes off you? Maybe she's softly gazing into your eyes or staring at your lips.

If her eyes are on your mouth, she is very interested in you. She's attracted to you and won't think twice if you kiss her then and there. If you're not careful, she might just lean in and steal a kiss from you first!

Now Listen Carefully-

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The Crucial Element in Successful Dating

"A wise man should not fear losing anything in life if he is able to preserve his peace of mind," taught the Roman philosopher Epictetus two thousand years ago. When you are out there looking for the right person to share your life with, you should remind yourself that maintaining your balance and self-esteem is going to put you way ahead of the game.

When it comes to dating, each of us can easily make a list of unpleasant situations that we would rather avoid in order to keep our tranquillity. For instance, most men and women would consider themselves happier if they could avoid dealing with nasty people altogether. The same preference applies to averting unwanted criticism. Last but not least, wouldn't our days be easier if we never had to comply with silly rules?

The crucial element in successful dating is rational persistence. The question is how we can sustain our motivation long enough to achieve our romantic goals. Indeed, looking for a soul mate would be less complicated if we could keep away all those inconveniences, but let's face the truth, the world is not going to turn into paradise tomorrow morning. Negative personal interactions are particularly aggravating during dating, since love seekers who invest themselves heavily in their search often place their egos in the line of fire.

The good news is that you can minimize your dating annoyances if you grow a thick skin, that is, if you become more philosophical about life. Learn to enhance your psychological resiliency and this knowledge will serve you well for the rest of your life. The techniques are not difficult and you can practice them on your own. During your dating adventures, you will have ample opportunity to test the validity of these theories.

One can only wonder why mental resiliency is rarely taught at school. Every little elephant in the savannah knows how important it is to grow a healthy thick skin for protection against weather inclemencies, viruses, and infections. In the same way, human beings need to develop a sound psychological armour against the inevitable frictions of social life.

Which techniques can you use to build up a psychological protection layer as thick as the rugged skin of an elephant? In the case of dating, my choice of methods would go towards cultivating deliberate slowness and purposeful indifference. Let us see how these two techniques work in practice.

When you meet new people with romantic purposes in mind, some of your new acquaintances will be great, others will leave you cold, and a few will personify everything that you can possibly dislike in a human being. If you are attending a social event or have been invited for dinner by friends, you might not wish to leave right way, but on the other side, you really don't want to drag along all evening in conversation with obnoxious strangers.

In those cases, adopting a strategy of deliberate slowness can work wonders. By the way, this is an approach that you can take to defuse many exacerbating social situations. Deliberate slowness is the ideal defence mechanism on those occasions when someone is verbally distressing you or bothering you at a party.

Should you find yourself in that situation, the perfect way to play is not to get angry. Instead of arguing and reacting with indignation, you can pretend that your brain needs hours to absorb the simplest information and stall. Very often, people will succumb to their own impatience, rate you as a hopeless bore, and leave you in peace.

The second technique, purposeful indifference, requires longer training, but its field of application is much wider. Occasionally, during the dating process, you won't be able to escape nasty, unfair criticism, threats, or warnings, either from friends, family, or strangers. Don't let them ruin your day. Remember that it is great that people are free to express their opinions even if they don't know what they are talking about.

Put on your best poker face, say that you take note of their comments, and walk on. As soon as you are away from the scene, shrug your shoulders and don't let anxiety take control of your mind. Reserve your energies for the next date, where you might meet just the right person for you.

Looking for soul mate is difficult enough. Let us not allow ourselves to be affected by nonsensical remarks from other people. As Epictetus observed in Ancient Rome, "some men find joy in fishing and others in hunting, but for me, there is no greater pleasure than living my days with measure." Take advantage of your dating experiences to develop a thick skin. In addition to facilitating your search for love, you will be making yourself an invaluable present.

JOHN VESPASIAN writes about rational living and is the author of the novel ”When everything fails, try this.” He has resided in New York, Madrid, Paris, and Munich. His stories reflect the values of entrepreneurship, tolerance and self-reliance. See John Vespasian's blog about rational living.

http://johnvespasian.blogspot.com

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by JOHN VESPASIAN

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