Fear of Approaching Women

You stand there immovable with your hands sweating, your heart beating twice as faster, your lips seem to be sealed by something and your eyes fixated on HER… Your dream girl is standing over there but you just can't approach her. Come on, we have all been there. Don't be ashamed to admit that. We always wanted to approach the women we wanted and talk to them but never really got ourselves to do that. Why so? What is the reason behind that? Yes, in this article, we are going to discuss about approaching women in general. Well a little looking at the subject will reveal actually one reason. It's FEAR. Fear of approaching women! But, fearing what? Are we really afraid of the woman? Are we afraid of her harsh words? Some say that we fear being REJECTED. I think if I had been in a room alone with a girl and I said "hi" to the girl or made any move on her and she rejected, I could not have cared less about that. Darn! Nobody is going to know and I don't even care if she is going to share this experience with her friends or not. I think our fear is getting rejected IN FRONT OF OTHERS (in the simplest of language). We hate being rejected in front of others. Believe it or not, most of us, or rather almost all of us, are specifically driven by our ego. We don't really understand ourselves truly but we understand what our EGO makes us understand. And having this fear is absolutely normal. In our animal society, we are judged by our social standard and class. More social status, better survival rate, more resourceful and better future… It is as simple as that. We love power. Not muscular power but social power. Where ever it comes from. Whether the muscle or money. And for this particular reason, we fear approaching the fairer sex. And this is all aggravated by the false attitude put up by the woman. You go to any bar or club and you find the hot girls standing there with an attitude of "Don't even dare to come near me; you will get burnt". Oh well it's scary and this makes the fear of approaching women all the worse. I know that. I have been through that. And let me tell me I still feel that. Remember, it's never going to GO AWAY. It is embedded in our basic psychological and nervous hardwiring and it is to stay. Yes, I iterate myself once again… We fear approaching women and we will continue to experience that peculiar stomach wrenching feeling in the future as well. But the point is in getting control over it and being able to overcome it over the time.

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From Fantasy to Adultery - Avoiding True Intimacy

My mother once told me that, according to the Catholic faith, in God's eyes a man who imagined having sex with a woman who wasn't his wife was as guilty of adultery as the man who actually had sex with another woman. Now that I'm older, I realize that means we're all going to hell for adultery, so we might as well have some fun along the way.

Seriously, though, where and how do you draw the line? I took an informal poll recently about affairs; I wanted to know if people thought an emotional affair with no intercourse or a one night stand (with intercourse but no emotion attached) would be more damaging to a long term relationship. I suspected the line would be drawn across gender lines, and for the most part I was right. Most of the women thought an emotional affair would be more damaging, while most of the men thought the one night stand would be worse. This speaks to how men and women view sex differently; most women need emotional stimulation to become aroused, while men need visual stimulation.

The other day my friend David Cates had this to say: "I've often said that many women are addicted to porn, too - it just comes in the form of romance novels instead of the graphic pictures men prefer. There's eye-porn and emotion-porn... and they're all fantasies that take us away from real people in the real world... and eventually take us away from our real selves, too. Genuine intimacy flows from authenticity."

Everyone fantasizes about sex. Most people use fantasies during sex to help them get or stay aroused. But do you want to know what's really arousing? Open your eyes and become present to your partner. Use all of your senses to really feel both of your bodies. Engage your mind with what's actually happening rather than what you're imagining. This might sound simple, but it actually requires courage and a willingness to be vulnerable to your partner.

Most people in our culture are terrified of true intimacy. It requires us to be naked, spiritually and emotionally, with ourselves and our partner. Most people can't even handle being that intimate with themselves. It's too vulnerable, and we've been conditioned for too long to censor our real thoughts and feelings to subscribe to cultural norms. We use fantasy, pornography, and affairs to ensure we don't have to become too intimate with anyone.

Used properly, fantasy, pornography, and even affairs can help to increase intimacy. The stage has to be set properly and both partners have to be conscious participants, but sex within long term relationships can be an amazing way to help us grow emotionally and become more authentically ourselves. It's not for the faint of heart, and its intention is not just to make better sex, although that's a delightful side effect.

Sex, handled in this way, becomes the crucible for raising our consciousness. It teaches us about ourselves on a deep level, uncovering the hidden language of our self-talk and bringing it into the open for transformation. It makes us more authentically ourselves, and from that place of authenticity we can make empowered choices about our lives.

Imagine how much better the world would be if more of us began using orgasms to achieve enlightenment. Who wants to play?

Johanna Lyman
Spiritual Love Coach
Romance Recovery: Whether You Stay or Go, Do It With Courage, Clarity and Ease
http://www.romancerecovery.com
Visit http://www.romancerecovery.com/events/ for upcoming events.

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Top 5 Ways to Find Your Girlfriend Or Wife Cheating on You

A lot of men seem to think that it is difficult to find out for sure if their girlfriend is cheating on them. However, there are actually a lot of ways, besides just using a reverse phone number check service, in which you can tell whether or not your girlfriend is cheating on you. The top 5 ways in which to do this include:

1. If you want to know for sure and don't want to use a reverse number check service, then you could always use what is known as a semen detection kit. This will help you find out if your girlfriend is being intimate with someone other than you.

2. You could use one of your friends to try setting her up and catch her flirting with him. This is something that you could even have your friend do via text messaging. Just remember that you did this in case you choose to use phone number reverse lookups later on.

3. Create a fake online profile with photos of a great looking guy. You can then flirt with her or ask her for her phone number. Of course, this won't tell you who she's actually cheating with, like a reverse number check would.

4. Be really sneaky and act like you are going away for a weekend then stick around to see where she goes and who she brings home. If you have already ran an address look up phone number, this will tell you a lot more about the guy you did the reverse phone number check on.

5. You could always do a reverse phone number check. This will tell you who she's talking to and you can also find out other details about this person whenever you use a reverse number check.

More articles on reverse phone lookups here - Discover the truth today!

Learn more about reverse phone lookups and try it for yourself - ReversePhoneNumberCheck.net

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Why are older women not into younger guys???

Are people that naive... I guess women dont watch porn.. The "M.I.L.F.' phenomenon is rampant... Go take a look.. make a search.. understand just what it is that makes you so suddenly popular. Variety is the spice of life...

At work guys are all about the older women now... and trust me ladies... it's not because of your eternal wisdom... i dont care what age you are... If you dont have TALENT, and you cant TALK your way ourt of a paperbag... I would gladly introduce you to someone whose views of age and beauty as something that worthy value.

All this crap about older men being jaded.... oh lord... dont go there.... there is a plethora of jaded women here... My one and only date from POF was with a woman who was out to 'get' her ex husband.... YIKES>>>


This says it perfect and yes like the saying goes? The truth hurts and people hate accepting or hearing the truth.

I even know guys in their 30's, who say "Oh look at that MILF" and she is 50.
But I am shocked women can't understand why younger guys contact them or hit on them. Really you cannot tell me you are that naive. There is no way a slew of women are that clued out. No way. Just a front to say "Wow I don't get it, why do they all like me" as it is a nice ego boost. Say you are 42 and it makes you feel attractive because you are thinking you are getting older. A young hot guy shows some sort of attraction to you and it feels good.
Let's think for a second and don't be saying "Oh you are jaded, you are jealous etc" just think of this for one second. If women of a certain age are showing interest in men of a certain age, do you not think THAT encourages them and entices them to show an interest in those women? Not about confidence, it is about knowing or at least what appears to be the age range of women who date men who are in their 20's.
I am sure that if a ton of women were into dating men say 38-42 and that was popular, you don't think guys that age would be interested in those women more often? Of course, because like women in their 30's and 40's dating men in their 20's, it gives the guy more of a good chance to actually date someone that much older.
And why does everyone sugarcoat it, when you know the younger guy is wanting to have the experienced sex with someone older. And ya right all these women say it is not a control thing? You have the control in the bedroom being the older woman and unlike a guy your age, where both of you like what you like, a young guy is into learning so again a nice ego boost of course.
Hey I could never in my life date a woman close to my mom's age, just like date a woman young enough to be my daughter. Ya sure some 50 something women look hot, some younger women in their 20's look hot but beyond that what is there? And the thing about guys who are older being all jaded. When did women never become jaded. Just like the set in their ways comment. It always seems the guys are always completely in the wrong here. makes me sick. Both men and women do become jaded as they get older from being burned. Men and women both become set in their ways as they get older. What the underlying reason for going younger I believe for the women is the feeling. A guy who has less experience in dating and sex.
Also the young guy/older girl thing is like in school, the boys become teacher's pets, they have the crushes on their teachers. The boy has the fantasies about his teacher.
Hey I am not against this young/older thing just ladies stop the bashing as your reasons.
I know what my problem is in dating, I am sure if you took a step back and thought about things, you would see the reason why men your age do not contact you or why you seem to not date men your age.
It is a two way street, not one side to blame here.

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Why do women refuse to make a first contact after you have already met

I haven't got a problem calling..once I am both comfortable that he is the type of guy that doesn't mind, and I am comfortable that we are actually dating, not just in the see what happens phase...some men do not like being called..they like the decision of when they feel like talking in their hands..and most don't like phone calls without a purpose...many women know this and don't want to offend a guy..it isn't a big enough deal to write him off..and in the beginning stages it makes sense not to step on his toes...or worse, be seen as needy or stalking...plus, there is a correlation , silly book and movie or not..with, if you, as a woman . have to do all the initiating, you never know his true interest..once a relationship is established in some sense...I haven't got a problem calling if I need /want to...

I personally have a phone phobia about calling people I don't know well...I don't like being an unexpected and unwelcome surprise, nor being thought of as a pest..or invading people's space, or interrupting something important..and some see unexpected phone calls as just that...

Women are also pretty indoctrinated, no matter what the prevailing theory or societal expectation is, that it is unseemly for them to be do anything that seems like chasing...and some women just aren't secure enough to risk it...

OP: In your case, it sounds like more than whether she called or not...it also sounds like your relationship was a stage where she should have been comfortable calling...unless it was all about the attention for her...

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The Secret First Step to Get Your Ex Back in Seven Days Or Less

A relationship is never meant to be difficult, but a certain degree of sacrifice and compromise are always critical to keep the relationship healthy. While we are getting your ex back, you should keep this in mind. Nothing makes mending a broken relationship easy, but if you take to heart what I'm going to share with you in this article it will certainly makes it a whole lot easier for yourself and definitely give your ex good reason to come back.

I know exactly how painful a breakup is but rather than staring yourself blind against the surface question "how can I get back together with my ex?", you should start focusing on rectifying what caused the breakup in the first place. This will immediately start lifting the tension and stress that caused the breakup.

So how do you do this?

The answer is simple. When your ex boyfriend or girlfriend decides to break up with you, then it is most likely because of the following two reasons: Either the relationship became stale because you entered a comfort zone so that there wasn't enough of the real you in it anymore, or the relationship was getting too claustrophobic because you were asking too much and there was too much of you in it. What ever side of the coin you are on, these two causes will lead to certain relationship suicide. It's now time for you to do a quick self-analysis to see if you were guilty of any of these relationship sins.

Unfortunately in most cases the breakup occurred either of something you did or did not do. I don't mean to be harsh, but this is a very simple and effective way to look at it. Whatever your answer is, the end result remains the same. Something drove your ex away. So what to do next, and how can you get your ex back? The first step is to take the useful insights you have now and determine exactly what needs fixing in the relationship.

As you are taking a really hard look at your situation, draw up a list of things the could have led to the breakup, as well as which of those things were most likely your fault and which were not.

Rule out the ones that you cannot control as they will always remain out of your control. Look at the ones that you are responsible for and now think about if and how you can change that specific problem. If you're starting to see a clear pattern of being able to fix a lot of these problems, things are definitely looking good. If you are willing to make some changes, you have just taken one huge step towards getting your ex back.

Just remember, knowing how to get your ex back is not enough. Nothing will happen until you take action right now!

This is the first step in a proven strategy to get your ex back. It doesn't stop here, though. What you do next is crucial to get your ex back. Don't throw away your chances by not knowing what to do next. Read the following page carefully -- it holds the final key if you want to know how to get ex back: Magic Of Making Up Review

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Special Wedding Anniversary Gift Ideas - Make Your Anniversary an Occasion

Staying married is a great achievement especially in this modern society where people throw away marriage and family whenever it doesn't suit them or gets too tough. Sometimes marriages fail but couples seem less likely to really fight to stay together with counseling or talking things through. It might be just a reflection of the selfish and heartless times we live in. So any marriage that can last should be really celebrated if not by those who have supported the couple through the difficult times but by the couple themselves.

A 10 year celebration: traditionally a gift of tin or aluminum is given but in modern traditions it's diamonds. Usually I personally prefer tradition but in this case a bit of bling is just the right thing to show each other you still sparkle. Why not get a diamond put in your wedding rings?

A 15 year celebration: crystal traditionally or watches in modern gifts and again his and her watches would be nice and add some lovely pieces to your collection, but a crystal vase or decanter set would be also nice. There are also many crystal pieces of jewellery, pendants and gems available on-line.

A 20 year celebration: china or platinum, for those wanting to really celebrate why not by some china in china and go on a holiday. Buy a vase or commemorative plate with your names and wedding dates on them. You could get new platinum wedding bands done and renew your wedding vows.

A 25th celebration: known as the silver wedding anniversary should come with some kind of party or grand gesture because this really is an achievement. Going on a holiday, weekend away or throwing a party would be great, but if you want a personal experience book some time together away from everything and go out shopping and buy things for one another as anniversary gifts.

A 30th celebration: the pearl wedding anniversary is also a diamond in modern traditions but again if you didn't go all out at your 25th then you should do now, assuming you don't have any dependable, just go on holiday somewhere special and find the time to have a romantic break away. Even if you don't go abroad you must renew your vows and have a party and celebrate the achievement!

A 40th celebration: Ruby wedding anniversary. Buy that lovely piece of ruby in a necklace or bracelet or both if you can afford to, with matching earrings because you should be spoilt. Although what a man would do with ruby earrings I can't explain although ruby cufflinks or tie pin would be sweet. A new set of golf clubs or a new car will show him how you feel, something equally grand and meaningful because it is a time to really spoil yourselves if you can.

A 50th celebration is the gold wedding anniversary and really throwing a huge family celebration is usually the best way but also the couple themselves should have a holiday. Maybe the family could all pool their money and send them away somewhere special, to the place they had their honeymoon, or somewhere they always wanted to go.

Just ensure any specialist piece you have purchased comes from a reputable online retailer with a verified security certificate to ensure your personal date is safe when you buy.

Oliver is a avid web security analyst who trys to promote the correct ways to secure corporate websites. Oliver works for ssl247.co.uk who specialise in Free SSL Cert as well as Thawte Web Server Extended Validation certificates for web servers in the UK.

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What You Should Wear to a Wedding - Rules and Traditions

One constant thing in our surroundings is change. It is because of unswerving transformation that so many developments are made. Wedding outfits have also been gone through the same change process. Currently, there are endless designs and styles of wedding dresses available in the market. You can find the traditional as well as the modern wedding outfits.

As the first rule, the outfit you select for some wedding highly depends upon the place where the wedding has to take place. Nowadays, people hold weddings in a variety of places such as the Churches, beaches, wedding halls etc. Therefore, the dress you select for one place will not necessarily be appropriate for another. Therefore, try to get the details after receiving the invitation because it will help you to select your dresses for that particular wedding.

Traditionally, if a wedding will be held in the daytime, it will require different clothing from the one which takes place in the evening, because the timings certainly influence the selection of colour, style, and accessories. If a wedding is in Church, women should dress up in a way that their shoulders and knees are properly covered. As it is a religious place, it requires you to dress up with modesty.

On the other hand, if a wedding is to be held on a beach, you will wear any stylish dress, which does not have to be too formal. In case, after attending a church wedding, you have to go for a reception organised at some other place, then you can use a jacket, coat, or wrap.

Women have a great range of wedding outfits from which they can select what they want to dress in. Just go to any designer's shop, and see the ceaseless assortment of dresses. You can select a short dress or even a suit for an informal or semi-formal daytime wedding event. You can wear cocktail dresses for an informal or semi formal evening weddings.

However, if the wedding requires formal dressing and is held during the daytime, a short dress or suit is suitable. In addition to a hat or gloves can also be used. A long outfit can be worn for evening weddings, which as a tradition, calls you to dress up formally. Along with other accessories, you need to use jewellery to perfect your look. You should avoid black or full white for daytime wedding events.

Men also are now very choosy about their dressing. A dress shirt and pant along with a casual jacket is most frequently used outfit for daytime informal weddings occasions. For an informal evening wedding, the best option is a suit. Men can put on a dark suit with tie for formal day and night time weddings.

Besides these traditions of wedding clothing, your personal choice certainly needs to be considered while choosing an outfit for a wedding. However, it should still not be too alien and must complement the occasion so that you do not look weird amongst the crowd.

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How to Play Hard to Get and Make Him Commit Fast

When it comes to playing hard to get there is a balance which you must get right in order to win. After all, the last thing that you want to do is lose a guy's interest trying to play this game. However, playing hard to get can be very effective as long as you do it right. So how can you strike the right balance without really turning this guy off? Well, keep reading and these tips will help you to draw the line in the right place.

The first thing which you must do is keep some distance between you and him. If a man is being pursued by you then he is either going to get bored and move on or get comfortable in letting you do all the work. Let him have some space and take yours and you will be off to a good start in playing hard to get.

Second, when you are with him be all about him. This may not seem that you are hard to get but as long as you keep the first one in line then this point can be VERY effective. Pick some things to do which are really exciting and new. Make sure that you are flirting with him and just enjoying the moment and making it memorable.

Do not talk about commitment at all until he does first. You may have to wait a long time to have him bring this one up. However, you can be sure that if you do then the game of hard to get is over for good. Men are much slower to connect and build emotional bonds but once they do, commitment is no problem. You just have to make sure that they don't beat you to it.

These are the keys to playing hard to get and the fastest way to get a commitment from any man.

Imagine what if you could make any man adore you, chase you, love you, and commit to you? Click Unforgettable Woman Advice and learn 77 Secrets that ninety percent of women have never heard. You have got to see this!

This article is contributed by Tina Jones. Tina is part of the Unforgettable Woman Publishing Team. She works together with founder Alexandra Fox and writes dating/relationship articles for women who want to understand male psychology, how to attract men, and find true love. You can find more about Unforgettable Woman Publishing by visiting their website.

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